Sunday, May 29, 2022

Spider-Man

Short Answer: Amazing Spider-Man 3

See, Tobey Maguire, the original big-screen Spider-Man, had a trilogy (the first one, 2, and 3).

And the new Spider-Man, Tom Holland, had a trilogy: Homecoming, Far from Home, and No Way Home.

But the one in between, payed by Andrew Garfield, did not get a trilogy-- yet. He got an original movie, then a sequel... and that's it. 

The problem is that they went ahead and made movies about some of Spidey's best villains... without Spidey in the movies! They did Venom, Carnage, Morbius, and next is Kraven the Hunter.

Also, there is a group of anti-Spidey baddies called the Sinister Six. And now, they have all been introduced: Doc Oc (Tobey 2), Vulture (Tom 1), Sandman (Tobey 3), Electro (Andrew 2), Mysterio (Tom 2), and now Kraven. Who was the last one we would have needed, and so when I came up with this blog it seemed simple...

There needs to be another Amazing Spider-Man movie, and we need the sixth of the Sinister Six to be introduced. Do I need to say it? In the third Amazing Spider-Man movie, he fights Kraven.

Except now, Kraven is getting his own movie in 2023. The same way the other Spidey baddies got Spidey-less movies. 

And, even though there are still superheroes aplenty waiting to get movies, the baddies are getting theirs first (also true for DC: Joker, 2 Suicide Squad movies)-- which is another rant for another time.

So... who does that leave as the antagonist for the Amazing Spider-Man movie at this point? 

It looks, from the ending of Amazing 2, he makes quick work of Rhino. Jake and Neytiri took out a similar mech suit in Avatar without Spidey powers, so even though they don't show Spidey winning, it's implied.

Kingpin? He's already busy fighting Daredevil and now Hawkeye.
Hobgoblin? You'd have to sell me. Seems too close to Green Goblin for most audiences.

Spot, it seems, they are saving for the sequel to the Spider-verse animation, which makes total sense.

I would have preferred Kraven, because he's more interesting and original. And it seems that this is true to such a degree that, sigh, he's getting his own movie.

But Silver Sable is a good choice. It would be nice (and about time) for Spidey to face a female baddie. 
Then there are Scorpion, who always seemed like a version of Lizard, and Jackal.

Speaking of Silver Sable... this just seems to be one of the things they know how to do with female baddies-- make them versions of Catwoman. At least she's more original than Black Cat. But also along those lines are Black Widow and Black Canary (why always black?) and Huntress. At least Silver Sable isn't Black Sable. 

Jackal is also interesting but it just seems that so many Spidey villains are animal-themed for some reason: Vulture, Rhino, Octopus, Chameleon, Lizard, Hammerhead, Black Cat, Man-wolf, Tarantula, Grizzly, Iguana, Scorpion, White Rabbit, Beetle, Swarm (bees), Vermin (rat), Hippo, Gibbon, Puma, Kangaroo, Panda, and even a Stegosaurus. 

Don't like any of these? Maybe you're just being Mr. Negative. 



Friday, May 20, 2022

National Treasure/ Da Vinci Code

Short answer: Crossover! And head for Latin America. 

The first National Treasure movie deals with the American Revolution and the Civil War. 

The three Robert Langdon (aka Da Vinci Code and its sequels) movies are all set in Europe.

And there are four presidents big-deal enough to be on Mt. Rushmore-- Washington and Jefferson, who were involved in the Revolution, of course, and Lincoln presided over the Civil War.

Leaving Theodore Roosevelt. His war? The Spanish-American War. Which, you guessed it, was with Spain. 

Which is in Europe. Which is where the Da Vinci Code movies are set.

So there's the plot. It involves clues on the American side pursued by Ben Gates (Nic Cage) and Spanish clues pursued by Robert Langdon (Tom Hanks).

The Spanish-American War involved the Caribbean and also the Philippines and even Guam. So the sleuths could run into each other in any of those locales. They might first be suspicious of each other but quickly learn each is only in pursuit of truth. 

Because the plot involves Spain, any former Spanish colonies, and any history of the Inquisition-- which was run by the Catholic Church, which is Langdon's expertise-- can come into play. So can the conquistadors, lost gold and other artifacts, etc.

Because Teddy Roosevelt was involved, other locations come into play. He founded the National Parks system, for instance. He worked as a rancher out West, and for the police force in New York. He was McKinley's Navy Secretary, and later hunted game in Africa, among many other places his amazing life took him. 

One was the Panama Canal, which he pushed for, and that is also in former Spanish colonial land. 

The clues could lead all over the world, necessitating both the skills of Franklin and Langdon, as well as their teams. One could even be a... teddy bear. 

There are really only two other wars, fought pre-1900, well-known enough to warrant tie-ins with the National Treasure franchise: The War of 1812 and The Mexican-American War. There are other famous incidents that could be used as well: The Raid on Harper's Ferry, The Alamo, the completion of the Continental Railroad, etc. 

And then we could always go back to the American Revolution and the Civil War-- it's not like there aren't other historical figures, landmarks and documents to reference. 

Plus, who says only president and generals were involved in such doings? Certainly the great money-makers of the past-- inventors, bankers, factory owners, rail and oil barons, etc.-- were capable of hiding clues and treasures. By now, even the 1920s are "a hundred years ago." So you can add steampunk and early electrical doodads into the mix. 

Note: There is also a 3rd Langdon book, which can be turned into a TV or streaming movie.

Tuesday, May 17, 2022

Mad Max

Short Answer: Before Thunderdome

One of the most intriguing characters in the series is Auntie Entity, who built and runs Bartertown. While a very rough-and-tumble place, it is an oasis of law in a lawless wilderness.

So... how did she do it? Why is this the only truly functioning society that we see, that has any resemblance to the world as we know it now?

And who is Entity? How did she manage to wrest a semblance of order out of this chaos?

We have seen that a female-led Max Max movie can be very successful, as can black-led action films like Blade, Black Panther, and I Am Legend. 

Maybe it's time to have a black woman be the main character of a Mad Max movie. My pick would be Letitia Wright, who played Shuri in Black Panther.

Since Max only meets Entity in the third movie, this will be a "Mad Max movie without Mad Max in it," but we have already seen movies helmed by Spider-Man's baddies without him in it. 

Also, we have a title (see above) that instantly defines and sells the movie. 

Sunday, May 8, 2022

Vacation (National Lampoon)

Short Answers: National Parks... or Prequel

The Griswolds have gone on Vacation to Wally World, then tried again in another generation. They have also had two Christmas vacations, plus one each to Europe and Vegas.

It would seem obvious to go to another foreign place, except for the fact that mocking Asians, Africans, and Latin Americans would not really be read as "funny"today. Plus, they went the "exotic" route in the second Christmas movie.

Which leaves Australia, and we should not rule that out. While it's a well that has been gone to several times, it has not been done recently, and the Aussies generally have a sense of humor about themselves.

In America, though, there are still plenty of places to visit, but Hawaii or Louisiana are going to be places where, again, ethnic humor is too tempting.

Which leaves Mother Nature. The Great Outdoors. Namely, The National Parks. Attempted by a family who are very much "indoor cats." Having the weather, terrain, poison ivy, and various wildlife be the antagonists.

Rather than stick to one, the grand plan would be to experience three or four in one month, each with a different climate. To make it plausible that they spend five days in each and drive on the weekends between them would take some atlas work by the writers, but if they stuck to the West it could be done. 

One would have to be Yosemite or Yellowstone. One could be somewhere hot and arid, like The Grand Canyon or Zion, which is where they would start, and then head north to one of the Ys. And then they would finish somewhere cold, like Glacier National Park. 

Another option would be to finally see the trip that started it all, the original family vacation that Clark wants so desperately to relive with his family in the first movie. 

Retro is in. Think of the cars, the clothes, the music, the slang-- it would be this generation's Back to the Future, Grease, or A Christmas Story, in terms of the sets and setting. Clark remembers it now through a rose-tinted station wagon windshield... but what was it really like? 

The movie would reward those who saw the 1983 Vacation movie multiple times by depicting all of the things Clark describes to his kids in it.

It would also be a fun movie for kids to see with their grandparents, and ask... Gee, was that was it was really like?

In any case, an attempt should be made to include as many National Lampoon alums as are still around. If you are going to do nostalgia, do it right.

Sunday, May 1, 2022

Batman

Short answer: Nightwing 

While Marvel keeps introducing new characters to moviegoers, DC seems content at releasing Batman movies, then Superman movies... then more Batman movies, etc. Yes, we have seen one Aquaman, one Green Lantern, and one Shazam movies, and now two Wonder Woman movies.

But mostly, it's Batman's turn, the Superman's, then Batman again, then Superman...

There are many more DC heroes that can be rolled out. Flash is supposed to get a movie soon. But many of the others have not just been relegated to TV, like Green Arrow and Supergirl, they even have to share the show Legends of Tomorrow. 

But the Joker movie gives us the possibility of "a Batman movie without that much Batman in it" (apologies to the Monty Python "spam" sketch). 

Which means the next Batman movie should be a Nightwing movie. 

It really seems that Robin is just a non-starter. He was in, of course, Batman & Robin, which was widely panned. His appearance was teased in The Dark Night Rises... but in the new movie The Batman, he's only teased again. He mostly shows up in goofy, cartoony fare like the Lego Batman movie and the two Teen Titans shows.

Since they clearly don't want us to see Robin in a live-action setting-- and given his outfit, we can see why-- what if we just fast-forwarded to Nightwing?

This character, for those not in the know, is what the first Robin, Dick Grayson, becomes when he grows up. He has learned all Batman can teach him, but he has his own way of fighting crime and graduates from the Batcave. 

Again, DC seems dead set against following the successful Marvel practice of rolling out movies for even its most obscure heroes. They relegate even other Justice Leaguers like Hawkman, the Martian Manhunter, Green Lantern, The Atom, Plastic/Elongated Man, Black Canary, Red Tornado, Zatanna, Firestorm, Blue Beetle, Dr. Fate (yes! that many!) and others to the backgrounds of shows like those in the "Arrowverse" and, earlier, Smallville. 

Batman alone has had nine films in which he is the main hero, starting with the Michael Keaton one in 1989, while-- aside from Superman-- only 4 other Justice Leaguers have had even one or two films each.

Peripheral Batman characters-- like Batgirl, Batwoman, Oracle, and even Alfred, Commissioner Gordon-- have proven compelling in leading roles, and Nightwing did have his own animation. 

Creating a Nightwing movie gives DC what it seems to want-- yet another Batman movie-- and also gives the audience what they want: another DC superhero to root for.

Ghostbusters

Short Answer... You got me. See, the movie that rebooted the series. subtitled Afterlife, came out in 2021. So I have had the time to see it...